so for the rec-

she's completely and totally correct.
for once? as always? i've forgotten.

ahh, well.
who can believe it's nearly 2009?
MP and I pondered the question as we laid on Da's (now my) bed and thought about where we were in our lives one year ago today. My, my...

Light,
S-

P.S. - I'm hoping for a really amazing New Year's. We'll see.
P.P.S - "you're wiser beyond your years... i don't think this is your first walk on this planet" Wow. That's such an amazing compliment...I hope so!!!
P.P.S - BEST NEWS EVER!!! I'm so...speechless. www.finalreckoning.us

Long live the good life.

winter

I miss writing, although I'm pretty sure no more than perhaps one or two people even check this site anymore. Regardless, writing still feels relieving and comforting, even if no one ever reads it. Perhaps especially if no one reads it...
We arrived home this morning from our trip to New York City. Overall the trip was simply fantastic. We spent Christmas with the Edwards, with whom I feel so comfortable and at home. All 29 of them welcomed us into their home like we were truly one of the family. I met many new people and was thankful to see some familiar faces of those I knew. Serving dinner for 34 people seemed effortless for the experienced cooks among the family, although it was hard to see Laura forced to the sidelines due to her cancer. We all did our best to keep her positive...something many people forget to do even in times of health. I promised I'd see her again...I know she'll make it through this. There's no way she can't with all of her family supporting her...
In addition to spending time with the Edwards, we of course did TONS of shopping, visited some sites, and had more than enough family time. We successfully escaped both the Christmas and the New Years rape-r, made up and then referenced a new drug (JEWEED!) and 5 out of 5 people agreed that Emily's made up statistics are annoying. The 'inside jokes' that our family trips generate may be my favorite part of traveling...Breakfasts at Hot and Crusty or at Grand Central became a tradition, as did tea and sweets in front of the tiny TV in the kitchen of the apartment. Each morning we awoke (too early) and trekked into central Brooklyn or Manhattan to shop and enjoy the city...
On the 26th we went to the Christmas show with the Rockettes at Radio City Music Hall. I'd expected it to be too cheesy/touristy for my taste, but it was surprisingly SPECTACULAR. The Rockettes are simply amazing and their performance was flawless. Afterwards we all walked to Stage Diner and I had pastrami for the first time! Quality experience.

While the trip was wonderful, it's also great to be back home. I am so thankful for MP, without whom I would be so lonely...maybe I'm just as She said I'd be, left alone because of how I treat me, but MP and MR remind me I never will be truly forgotten or alone. I do wish a certain someone would pick up his phone, or a few certain someones would stop treating me as...well. Forget it.
Either way, I wish all of you a lovely winter and to those of you on holiday, rest, relax and enjoy!!

Light,
S-

long time no update

I really want to keep this alive.
Alas, no grand update right now.
Living life. Surviving. Having fun doing it.

;]


"We ain't goin' to the town
We're going to the city
Gonna trek this shit around
And make this place a heart
To be a part of
Again"

I have a new-found love for Interpol.

my life.

i was going to title this with the name of the CPD narcotics detective's name but then i forgot it

my goodness.
today was as bad as my weekend was good.
:glares:
Let's see...

Yeah, I'm guessing most of it isn't even fit to talk about right now.
Legalities and all?
I don't really know but I ain't about to chance dat shit, yo.
Can I just thank Mr. Stanfa, Kacie, Kegan + Yearbookers, Joey, and Neal?
mk. thanx.

I don't know what else to say.

Love,
S-

i never liked the rain 'till i walked through it with you...

What a day!

...
Woke at 1:56pm. Doubted it was really 1:56pm. Rubbed eyes, sat up, realized it was, and grinned. Four day weekends FTW? Absolutely. I stumbled out of bed to roam the house and lurk my usual websites of choice: Facebook, Meebo, 4chan...Mum was out doing her duty to our great citizens by working the polls, bless her soul. M was out, and E&C were still asleep, so I just relaxed and ate some macaroni and cheese and enjoyed doing nothing. Eventually M returned and we hung out a bit before she had to go to work.
I dropped Mel off at work and drove over to M's to hang out with L.. We sat around and sleepily watched election coverage and chatted. I really, really enjoy spending time with him...later we drove through the rain to Panera and both had soup. xD. It was simply lovely. I grinned thinking that the last time we'd gone out to eat together the weather was precisely the same. I'm beginning to love the rain... ;]
After I came home I made myself some cafe clasico and munched on some of the cake Mum made last night. I'd better learn how to bake, and soon, because I'm bot going to get through college without some homemade cakes and cookies. Maybe she will have to move in with me afterall. :shudders: I love my momma.
Since then, I've been fervently watching the election coverage. It was projected just a few minutes ago that Barack Hussein Obama has been elected the 44th president of the United States of America...I couldn't be happier. I am overjoyed that I was able to vote in this historic election, and I am beyond excited to see what the future holds for President Obama, our country, and hell...me.

All the best,
S-

"Tabitha?"

I woke with a start to the touch of his fingers stroking my hair. It was oddly beautiful.

My day was quite all right. Woke up early go to Crabtree with Mum and M. I had a really fun time shopping and loling and enduring an ungodly amount of puns. Had a good lunch and some nice quality family time. Returned with some great finds, the faux-suede fuchsia pumps perhaps being the best. Glad.
Relaxed and did nothing and loved it. Dinner. Wished he would call. Got all dressed up, but had no where to go. Drove on fumes to OE, attempted to parallel park. A gentleman asked if I was Tabitha, and I replied that sorry, but I was not. Recieved my usual free cup of coffee from M, tipped well. Allowed myself extra sugar, waited for the phone to ring. Settled at a table outside next to the windows and read for a while by the light from inside...I sipped my coffee and enjoyed a Parliment or two. Very content. Later slipped inside to warm up, but promptly dozed off to sleep in the depths of an easychair...he woke me up. Drove home in a daze.

Oh, four day weekends how I love you so.

Love,
S-

back by 'popular' demand?

Considering that I am unable to settle down to sleep and that a certain pretty lady suggested I revive this ol' thing, I decided to make a somewhat sensible blog post. Ohh, there is so much to say...I know I never will be able to recount it all, and I just hope I will never forget.

Now it is nearing 1:30am, Ginger is pawing at me incessantly for some reason still unknown to me, and I'm sitting here restlessly trying to articulate my thoughts. Today was...quite a day. I woke up early after not getting to sleep until after 3...per Mum's request I spent far too much time cleaning the house and organizing the kitchen pantry and the like. Finally, M and I were released from or household duties and went out to the barn. The weather had taken a wonderful turn for the better, and we were met with warm sunshine and a perfect Carolina blue sky. We rode for hours exploring the extensive trails behind the barn and out towards Duke Forest. It was lovely!!
Later I stopped by Caribou and met up with L and an assorted group of others. It was quiet and relaxing and I sat sipping my coffee and watching the group interact, which was rather fascinating as always. Later I drove L down to his place to save him the trouble of biking. I am kind, kind soul. I rushed off to meet L. at Open Eye. Head in the clouds, I hung a sharp right turn without paying any regards to a certain octagonal red sign. My eyes darted to the left a moment too late, and next thing I knew I seem dem flashing liiiights...
"I recognize you from Thursday night, ma'am."
Fuuuuck.
Several agonizing minutes later I was issued a citation and I have to go to court on the 10th of December. Awesome.

Angry and bitter, I sped off to meet up with L. We sat and chatted with a few acquaintances as I snuck glances at his smile and his eyes and felt oddly comforted.

All for now, I am finally feeling the exhaustion kick in. I am so happy with life right now, and it really is a great feeling. I feel wonderful...

- Happy birthday, Sarah and Celia <3 -
Light,
S-

ma'am,

i'm going to need you to take a deep breath and blow into this until say stop, all right?

ohhh my. what a night.
:

speechless?

i'll try to write about everything soon.

i am so thankful; i am so fortunate

you've gotta spend some time, love

strange.
i am no longer able to properly discern the difference between reality and fantasy. everything is simply a blurred line between the both.
i stood on the lawn, taking long, calming drags from a bummed cigarette.
reality seemed unimportant/
isn't it?
the wind whipped around me and i felt the chilly onset of autumn
oh, ilove her so.
i shuffled my feet and watched the cigarette burn, feigning sanity


Everybody leaves, so why, why wouldn't you?

nobody knows me at all

I don't know who to write to anymore, so I'll write to myself. For myself. I do everything for myself, don't I? Yes...
I look for myself. I love for myself. I want and desire and cry for myself.
Maybe they were all right...it's increasingly likely.

I had a very odd afternoon/evening/night. I met up with him. We drove and talked and spent entirely too much time together. I spent the remaining hours wondering what the hell had happened.

More later.

Opinions

S- yeah except now I don't have to worry about you flirting your ass off with every single guy who approaches you
S- which probably still happens
S- because, truth is
S- and scolnick was completely right on this one
S- you are a slut, susannah

Stand Clear of the Closing Doors, Please

I sat down intending to actually do my Lit. homework, but after realizing I left my copy of Portrait in the Lincoln and that it would be impossible to even attempt the work without the book, I turned up Lil Wayne and decided to blog instead.

Today was strangely fantastic. Tensions are running high here around the house, but I'm surviving. I woke up early-ish, and drove with Mel into town. We got some over priced coffee at Open Eye and chilled around town. I saw J, which was...crazy. Only one or two people know our whole fucking history, but sitting and talking to him and catching up over a plate of free rice was simply unreal. I scrawled my digits on a receipt and left, my head spinning. Mel and I dropped by S's house for a quick hug and an exchanging of smiles. Afterwards I rushed home and we promptly left for the Fashion Bug show in Durham. L. called me on the way and I chatted with him for a bit. We were supposed to chill today but it ended up falling through. :| The show went even better than expected. Fantastic, actually. Hopefully there will be some pictures online soon.
After the show I came home and was able to relax for a few hours. J called and I met up with him and A at our ancient hangout spot. I wish I could manipulate the beautiful words of the English language in a way that would do justice to the situation, but I know I can't. Something close to deja vu, yet entirely different. It was almost like visiting my former self...it made me realize how much I have changed and...improved. I am so much more secure and confident and it's simply amazing. We sipped Yuenglings and talked and lol-ed at M and T and P and a bunch of other wannabe P.O. kids. Un fucking real.

Love and light,
S-

I lifted my head from the clammy desk and my stomach reeled in protest of the slight movement. I clenched my teeth and tried to focus, but the pain was so severe that my very thoughts were muddled. I watched through filmy eyes as a disembodied hand tried to work out the problems on the sheet in front of me. The hand struggled, not knowing what to do all alone. "Math is the brain's expertise!" The brain smiled and chuckled. Suddenly the scene in front of me went black.
My body doubled over and a hand clamped over my lips. My body staggered over to the toilet and I hurled the contents of my stomach into the cold bowl. My senses went dark and the room was filled with nothing but sounds...they layered themselves in and around me, trying to invade me.
A voice asked if I could step outside and my limp body followed the reply. My body collapsed against the railing and the sun shone. The sun shone.

for dear life, we hold on

I can't fucking believe today.
:|

drugculture

i find great comfort in you

someone stole my cigarettes.
I was forced to drink my coffee without its harmful and addicting and deliciously calming counterpart this morning, and I was not happy.

It was an all right day. I was frustrated and unnecessarily snappy with a few people. :| Oops.

It's a very quiet afternoon. Out my window, the sun-coated leaves hardly quiver and everything around me seems unnaturally still.

the wind on the boat's deck is a cold hand on the neck
or slipping into our cold bed

love and light,
S-

Private

The following is very personal and was written for cathartic purposes.


There is one thing that reminds me I am not as selfish as they claim. One fatal flaw that keeps me here: my desire to please. I can't bring myself to do what I want to do so badly because of my love for those around me. As much as I want to believe everyone would be better off without me, I know they wouldn't see it that way. I find myself wishing with all my heart that I had never met those who I have come to love and those who love me. Without them, it would be so easy. So simple...I want to do it so badly. Each day my desire becomes stronger, and I feel myself losing my weak grip on the sanity I have left. I have simply no idea why those who do put up with me still do so.

Love and light,
S-

Unsettled

I could use a smoke, a strong cup of coffee, and a shoulder to lean on.

I got to see S today, who smelled like kitchens and smoke and familiarity. It was lovely.

I made lots of money working this weekend that had nothing to do with my boobs.

I'm hungry.

?
S-

Interesting Title That Has an Overly Obscure Reference to My Life

Hey there.
I'm at work right now, but the steady stream of customers has slowed and something compelled me to write.
Today is my last day working at the Scoop for the season. As much as I've complained about it, I really will miss this job, all its quirks, and the friends it has enabled me to make. But for now here I sit, taking in my surroundings and eating a chunk of peanut butter fudge.

I am very pleased with how my senior year is going so far (if you can consider one week any progress at all). I feel like a different person, and I just pray that I will be accepted for who I am. I am looking forward to so much, but with the excitement comes an unavoidable apprehension.

Vamos a ver...it's all we can do.

All the best,
S-

Everyone's Screaming, I am Dreaming of You...

Lion's Teeth is a fantastic song.

I quite enjoy school so far. I have several classes that I really love, and I think it's going to be a good year. I spend the first 55 of my school day sketching and painting and listening to whatever music Mr. Watson deems interesting, which is always entertaining. I have a few other classes that require little to no academic ability, which is great. I still always look forward to my blessed lunch periods. :smiles:

I wrote an autobiography for Lit which I am considering posting here. It'll be up if I ever get the nerve.


for dear life
we hold on,
S-

Woke Up New

It's so hard to write lately, which I find extremely frustrating.
The following is my attempt; excuse mistakes.

Today was the first day of my senior year. Someone quite special to me took me up on my offer, so I spent a lovely hour or so with M and S at Cup a Joe. Warm caramel latte, a smoke, and some much-needed relaxation. Aplus for sure.

After fixing my schedule (for the fourth time), I headed to my second period P.E. class. Coach Kieckbusch seems very nice, and I found myself resisting the urge to call him Paul. Paul...we spent most of the period talking about rules and consequences and other non-noteworthy topics. D has gym the same period, so I spent a while catching up with him. :]

Next I had Drawing and Painting. Mr. Watson has grown a beard, was wearing nice pants, and seems easy to get along with. E and a few others I know are in that class with me, and I found the period's activity and short lecture very intriguing.

Third period Lit was extremely intimidating, but when I noticed Mr. Head has a coffee pot, a stash of tea and something that could possibly be an espresso machine in his room, I figured we'll learn to get along. The reading quiz tomorrow? Let's pretend it's not going to happen.

It was a wonderful surprise to find both M and K in my Spanish class. I am so happy to have Moeller again. Who would have thought I'd miss her?! The class moved along very smoothly and I was pleased to see how quickly speaking the language came back to me.

Lunch was lovely. Filled with hugs and smiles and friendly faces and pizza that dear sweet M brought, the period ended far too soon.

Fifth period Discrete Math might be the best accidental decision I ever made. E is in it with me, and we sat together and caught up. :] Mr. Miller is distractingly tall with a rather monotone voice, but he seems rather harmless, other than his over-devotion to sports...

Sixth period Yearbook also went smoothly. The usual borderline creepy comments from Stanfa made me cringe/grin, and giggling with cutie-pie R made me happy.

I ended the school day with seventh period Religions, a class I am very much looking forward to. Loranger is her usual fantastic self, and I have many friends in that class. :]


EDIT : I never finished this yesterday, so I suppose I'll just add my closing remarks now. Overall, I'm looking forward to this year, but it certainly comes with a certain amount of apprehension as well. I suppose we'll just have to see. Today S lent me a sweatshirt, and I found myself almost unconsciously burying my head in it and breathing in the scent. It helped me realize that there's something I'm very much hoping for and maybe lucky number 27 will being it to me.

Best of luck and good wishes,
S-

How do you spell festivities?

If I told you everything about my last 24 hours, you wouldn't believe me. And I wouldn't want you to.

I feel rather awful right now, but MY, what an experience. I want so badly to write about it all, spill every detail with relish and delight and pain. But I won't. I want to curl up and fall into a deep, restful sleep, but I can't. I must be at work very soon.

I have realized there are angels among us. They walk the Goddess's great Earth with us, sometimes unseen and unacknowledged. Others have names and stories and some just happen to be unfailingly perfect and your best friend in the whole wide world. Some might be tall, soft spoken men from Ohio, with kind eyes and a Chevy pickup. Still others are baristas, dark hair lining their eyes, who can take one look at you and know it's not okay.

So how do you spell festivities?
A Styrofoam cooler, a borrowed green and pink bikini, looking into stunning eyes, late nights, impulsiveness, circle of death? Stolen toothpaste and sleepy mornings. Tears and phone calls and marshy ditches.


- "I don't want you to watch me brush my teeth!"
--"Is it bad that I don't care?"
- "Hmph"
--"You want to pout about it?"
-"Yes."

"NPH wouldn't do that."

...


Be well,
S-

Happy

I feel very content and very at peace.

Man of the Hour:

Education

We're still in Holden Beach, and I'd like to say not much has changed.
And really, an outsider would probably notice no change whatsoever. Late nights, even later mornings...working, sleeping, reading, and spending much time on the phone...

But I've learned...

I've learned not to judge a book by its cover - or even the blurb on the inside flap. Invisible Man is a lovely novel.
I've learned what burning flesh smells like.
I've learned what looks you get as you stand in line at the local Food Lion, clutching an economy-sized bottle of Draino and a box of pregnancy tests, hot tears rolling down your cheeks.
I've learned that in Shallotte, a real party happens in the woods behind Home Depot, and includes trucks, tents, a bon fire and several coolers...
I've learned that yes, you DO throw up. A lot.

M: "It's fine, she'll wake up soon."
Gas Station Attendant: "Don't be so sure. She might not if ya don't get some water in 'er."
-4:30am, 24hr. Kangaroo in Shallotte.

Be well,
S-

Fake

Oh, there is so much to say and think and dream and do.

Unfortunately, I haven't been doing much of anything except working, sleeping, and working.

My trip back to CH was very pleasant, though... Perhaps it confused things more, but it was very nice at times and I take what I can get these days.

I'm not feeling articulate, I apologize.

Soon,
S-

ess ay ee arr. <3

Have you even suddenly been filled with doubt?
Opened your eyes and given you head a prompt little shake to clear you mind, only to stop midway and think, "What the hell is going on in my life?"

I am so unbelievably angry right now. I don't know what to do or say or think or feel.
I hate being this upset.
I hate it so much. I feel so hurt and alone and really it's because I'm never satisfied and I push people away so they can't get close enough to hurt me. I'm tired of everything. And fuck it, I am so tried of crying.
It's ruining my complexion.

Me? Do you want to know me? Well, I'm Susannah. I'm a "backstabbing, motherfucking, ass-raping, happiness-sucking, plain, old bitch." You'd get "more out of talking to a comatose patient" than talking to me. All I spew is "bullshit." Why do I even bother talking?

-S

Tip of the Andes

This calls for a pot of coffee, be it 1:47am or not.

I don't care to explain

May you feel much better than I do.
S-

Strangely Enough,

I had an extremely difficult time sleeping last night.
I was certain falling asleep would be no trouble, for I was very tired. I bedded down and finished my novel (Peter by Kate Walker. Highly recommended.), but sleep never came. I lied awake, tossing and turning. Finally, after realizing that simply lying there was useless, I got out of bed, wandered the house, prepared a warm cup of almond milk and settled in front of the TV to watch hour upon hour of Platinum Weddings on WeTV. The show tells of random wealthy couple who lay down more than my entire house is worth on one wedding day. $65,000 tab for drinks alone? Yeah. $14,00 wedding dress? Nothing less! $250,000 engagement ring? You bet. It was slightly sickening, but entertaining I must admit.

I finally drifted off in front of the TV around 4:30am. Now it is far too early and my head is pounding from much too little sleep. I do find happiness is the fact that Alex will be here shortly to come to the beach with us, which I am very excited about. Also, last night was filled with wonderful conversations and good coffee.

Be well,
S-

Intense

Today we drove up from Holden so Emily and I could attend fashion show rehearsal in Raleigh.
It felt nice to be back in my element, so to speak. Bass pumping, beat thumping...sorrounded by frail, lofty girls with razor sharp hipbones jutting from beneath their paper-thin cotton ensembles. To hear the familiar click of so many sky high stilettos and feel my hips sway with familiarity to the beat of the music...
This was our first rehearsal for this particular show, but the whole thing is shaping up very nicely and I am very, very excited. The show is scheduled for August 1st through 3rd at Cary Towne Center mall in Cary. I hope some of you will be interested in attending; I would love any and all support. <3

Now, sitting alone watching the cloudy gray sky, I feel much less at home, even though that is precisely where I am. Sean is away in distant lands, Jolie has not returned my calls, Neal is occupied with his Nicaragua-trip-reunion pals and seemed annoyed by my call, and even a call to Meg yielded only the voice mail. I suppose I will continue to lounge around the house, reading and scheduling college visits and otherwise idly occupying my time.

I hope you all are well.
With all due respect,
S-

Bikini tops and pajama bottoms

Summer has really begun to settle in now..

Meg had to leave by bus Thursday, and I miss her very much. Her visit was a wonderful way to kick off summer here in Holden Beach.

My days since her departure have been occupied with sleeping late, occasional trips to Shallotte to stock up at the library, watching films, and working evenings at The Scoop. Melissa and I have gotten to know our coworkers a bit, and they all are nice enough. I stay entertained sampling our wares and making fun of Drew's heavy Eastern North Carolina drawl.

As I write this, Lily lies curled up on my tummy, convinced she is not in my way. I haven't the heart to tell her otherwise.

I wish all of you the best wherever your summer takes you.
S-

Not to complain, ocean eyes

Summer has been nice so far
More than nice, really.
Wonderful?

I haven't time for much of an update; dial-up is pointless and when a once-in-a-lifetime fast access opportunity arises, I rarely have time to blog anyhow.

Good thing she looks pretty
Eyes welling with tears, cheeks flushed and lips plump with emotion and hurt

Good thing she's heard the words over and over
Slut
or else it might be upsetting

Good thing she likes to sleep
Sometimes shutting the world out with the soft coma of sleep is the only way



EMOLICIOUS.
<3
Sunny beach days and cheery phone calls'll get me through.

the taste of strong, cheap coffee is still on my tongue
and my head aches dully from the night's events

a night never to be forgotten

cloudy moonlight
teasing summer breeze
rocky pavement beneath us
a moment captured forever
will my memory serve?



I never want to forget tonight.

Footprints

Home from a long day, blogging seems like the perfect way to unwind. Enjoy [?]

There really is a lot to say, a lot to be said, a lot I wish I could say, a lot my meager vocabulary couldn't do justice. My real journal has somehow disappeared, and I find I miss documenting the little intricacies of my life in great detail...however, doing so online is likely not a good idea. Perhaps it's time to invest in a pretty new journal. Vamos a ver.

I'm not sure how I feel about my previous stream of consciousness/poetry entry. I found it there after...a long day. Interesting, to say the least. It's actually pretty insightful if you know me well.

i find myself happy these days
Smiling comes so easily
now
I wake without dread.
i remember like yesterday
the cold mornings, my mind in the cloudy state between sleep and wakefulness,
waiting to open my eyes and remember why the first thing I felt each morning was a nagging pain in the pit of my stomach
reminding me
;

Exams began today. H. English III and Spanish III.
Extended lunch. Tall iced coffees, quiet chatter, and amazing company.
and hearts semi colon.

Reverse

Mango-mouthed and hazy-headed
Soft and haunting music floats from the speakers and my languid body lies
heavy ;
the soft blankets feeling steady and sober underneath it
Oh, Thunder Road
Were it you - strong but somehow// delicate; holding me
Lids droop, mind wanders, searching -
finds?
Slip a poorly folded sheet of paper from my back pocket
Pencil scrawls remind me
The noises blended together and my mind felt warm,
blanketed -
not suffocated, yet
I ignore the mistakes, casually scratched out
tucked in close
Warm by the fire, child
I will keep you safe
I admired his effortless ease and soft
allure
His muted confidence
Stunning
Set to repeat, the music does as it's told

"Travel is good for the troubled soul"

It's late Sunday night, and I'm in the mood to blog. For whatever mysterious reason, SC couldn't come over tonight, so here I lay, curled up in bed with the laptop, listlessly Facebooking and blogging, and creating sentences, with too many, comma splices. :]

Friday evening we left for Holden Beach. Overall the trip was very nice and relaxing. I spent Saturday napping and eating ice cream and watching very good movies. I had the pleasure of watching Love in the Time of Cholera, the film adaptation of Gabriel Garcia Marquez's book El amor en los tiempos de colera. I throughly enjoyed the movie; the filmography and acting were both brilliantly done. However, I feel it would have been an even stronger movie had the producers chosen to make the film in Spanish. Spanish was the native tongue for all the principle actors, and the novel was originally written in Spanish.
Saturday ended with a few lovely conversations with SC and a very restful night's sleep.

Today I woke up to a breakfast of waffles with strawberries and cream. Afterwards I watched Lucky # Slevin, which I enjoyed immensely. I'm not sure I can properly commend this movie, because my grasp of the English language simply isn't developed enough to accurately portray the greatness of this film. Enough said.

Afterwards, I went down to the beach for some sun and girl time with Melissa. Quality.
The drive home was less than pleasant. Emily and Colleen were behaving very poorly...kicking and screaming and carrying on. I still have a headache.

May tomorrow be pleasant.
Take care,
S-

Thankful

Not in the mood for a proper update, I decided instead to make a quick list of just a a few of the things I'm thankful for. Porque' no?

Starbucks, its commercial-yet-delicious coffee creations and its kind employees
Lincoln-ing <3
Anonymous poster
The Spanish language
Seeing my family happy
essemsea.
Final Cut Pro
Sunshine.

All the best,
S-

Smile Juice

Here I sit, peacefully sipping peach mango tea, listening to The Mountain Goats and thinking about life. I wonder if it's possible to be too...contemplative. I reflect upon life's happenings so much, I wonder if it's healthy. :smiles:

The past few days have been rather lovely. I had been feeling so much lately as though I was stuck in some sort of transitional stage, caught seemingly forever between the old and the new, the past never quite leaving and the future never fully arriving. However, as the days pass peacefully by, I find myself smiling more, laughing more, and truly living more. I must sound like a complete sap, but it makes me smile knowing I finally feel as though things are moving forward.

School is winding down, which of course comes complete with extensive end-of-year projects and final exams looming in the distance. However, even if it's just for this moment, I feel as if everything is going to be okay...


and she came here after midnight.
the hot weather made her feel right at home.
come on in, we haven't slept for weeks.
drink some of this. it'll put color in your cheeks.


May your mugs and hearts be equally as full,
S-

Unfortunately,

I feel more like vomiting than properly updating.

Ta ta,
S-

Under the Impression

It's a quiet, slightly lonely Friday evening and I thought I'd take a while to reflect upon the day for your reading pleasure.

Overall, it's been a generally productive and relaxing day. Lunch consisted of sunshine, Diet Coke, shirtlessness, cute haircuts and wonderful company. :)

Later I attended the mock crash presentation with Alix and Bea. It went very well, and I was touched that so many emergency service personnel took the time and effort to participate. I'm sure few of you know I've actually considered EMS work as a career. Hmm. After school, the three of us drove into town for manicures. It was a perfect, if not cutely stereotypical, time to gossip and catch up and enjoy one another's company. A chance encounter with a face from the past and a honey mustard crispy chicken wrap only served to make the afternoon even more lovely.

I'm very much looking forward to tomorrow! Plans are still a little up in the air, but I have many options that all involve a black satin mini dress, obnoxiously golden fingernails, best friends and quality time with El Alcalde. <3

Best wishes and goodnight,
S-

Obscurities

out: exes
in: oohs

words of the day: dissonance (n.) - a mingling of discordant sounds; especially : a clashing or unresolved musical interval or chord
pandemonium (n.) - a wild uproar


I enjoyed today.
<3


All the best,
S-

Wednesday Wonders

Hello faithful readers!

First, a quick note. Anyone discussed in my blog from here forward will be given a nickname. Each will bear some significance to his or her personality, habits, or true name. Good luck keeping up, since they are liable to change each entry. They are not so much for anonymity but rather entertainment.

Today has been quite nice, despite last night. After a throughly saddening conversation with Pear, I cried myself peacefully to sleep. Luckily I woke up feeling all right, if not a bit sleepy. Mum had prepared a chocolate croissant and a thermos of coffee for me, so I figured the day must be destined to go all right.

And so it did. It was rather lovely, actually. ;]

I'm still unsure as to Saturday night's plans!! As long as I get to wear my dress and take cutesy pictures and be with those I care about, I think everything will be great, though. We shall see! More details sure to come regarding plans.

I have something of a breakfast date tomorrow morning, thanks to the delayed opening. I'm pretty excited. Anything involving breakfast burritos and Jake is sure to be enjoyable.

Zak suggested that I make this a music blog, something I am very interested in doing. Keep your eyes open for my amateurish reviews of obscure bands, which will hopefully come sometime in the not-so-distant future.

All the best,
S-

Beginnings

I suppose this entry marks the beginning.

The beginning of a new and hopefully successful blog, surely, but it's the beginning of a lot more in my life, as well. The trouble with beginnings is that they are so often associated with endings.
Can beginnings really exist without the ending of something previous? Even birth itself marks the end of many things; a woman giving birth to a child must bid farewell forever to her former life.

Alas, as predicted, I ramble on with matters of little importance [or pertinence, rather]. All I really meant to do was introduce you, the lovely reader, to my blog. Its contents are sure to vary widely, but will somehow relate to the goings-on in my life.

We'll see how this goes!


All the best,
S-